The setting: in the Suburban, driving home from preschool.

Me: What did you do today?

Ivy: I sat on a orange furry friend, then a gween one. And I sat down in somebody’s chair on accident.

Me: Oh, really? Whose was it?

Ivy: It was the yellow table.

Me: Which table do you sit at?

Ivy: The wed one usuawy.

Me: Oh yeah? Who do you sit by?

Ivy: Riwey.

Me: Oh, Riley? Is that a boy or a girl?

Ivy: A boy. I reawy like his name.

Me: Yeah? Me too.

Ivy: Even I wuv him.

Me: [sharp intake of breath] You LOVE him?

Ivy: Yeah. I wuv Riwey and Mia [her cousin]

Whew. Dodged a bullet there.

The End.